Lower Expectations For Success!

Jasbina asks Dr. Diana Kirschner – In your book Find Your Soulmate Online in Six Simple Steps you also suggest to readers that they lower their expectations. Tell us what you mean by that.


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Dr. Diana Kirschner

It’s a very interesting thing. Expectations are tricky and they set you up for disappointment.

That’s across the board in all of your life.

  • They can set you up for resentments and all kinds of problems.
  • Expectations are very tricky. The idea is to take the right action.
  • You set everything up so that it’s attracting the right people and then let go.

This is a numbers game.

In the book, I talk about how to get your numbers way up so that many more men see your profile.

  • You can have it raining men.
  • When the numbers are up, you will have to go quickly and efficiently through a whole bunch of people that probably will not fit the bill until you hit gold.
  • You want to relax about that. You trade a few emails. You talk on the phone. You set up a coffee date in a public place and that’s it. It’s a yes or no.

All the time, you are winnowing out different people. You understand that this is what it is.

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This way, you don’t get burnt out.

  • You see this photo of this guy. You think, “He’s so perfect.”
  • Then he writes to you and he’s so perfect. You write to him and he writes back perfectly. It’s all perfect.
  • You’re in love. You’re married. You’re thinking about the future.

What happens when you meet him for the coffee date? You think, “Ugh!”


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What do you think?

Should one lower their expectations in relationships? Share your thoughts in the comments below.


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The above is an excerpt from Jasbina’s interview with Dr. Diana Kirschner.

The entire interview transcript is at: Diana Kirschner Interview: Online Dating Strategies

Listen to the entire interview on: Intersections Match Talk Radio – Jasbina’s Lifestyle Show

Listen to the entire interview on Blog Talk RadioFind Your Soulmate Online – In Six Simple Steps: Diana Kirschner

Listen to the entire interview on iTunes