Dating Reasonably: 3 Questions to Ask
Jasbina asks Neely Steinberg – Author of the book ‘Skin in the Game: Unleashing Your Inner Entrepreneur to Find Love’: You recommend that a woman ask herself what you call the “three reasonablys” after every first date. What are those three? How do they help avoid becoming unconstructively extreme while dating?
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Dating Reasonably: 3 Questions To Ask Yourself
- Did I have a reasonably good time?
- Was I reasonably attracted to him?
- Did we have a reasonable amount of common interests?
It doesn’t mean that it had to be the best, most exciting first date of your life. It’s not that you think:
- I want to marry this man.
- I know he’s the one.
For myself personally, every time I had that sort of connection with a man on a first date from the very first second, it ended in shambles. You end up putting blinders on to a lot of red flags that start popping up.
Dating Reasonably? Check With These Three Questions
1) Did you have a reasonably good time? Did you have nice conversation? Did you enjoy each other’s company?
It doesn’t have to be to the extreme. If it was a terrible time, of course, I’m not saying to go out on a second date. Find the balance there.
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2) Was I reasonably attracted to him?
He didn’t knock your socks off. He wasn’t 100% your physical ideal but there were certain things that you did find attractive about him.
- Maybe he had sexy hands
- A sexy smile
- Or you liked the way he was dressed.
Instead of poking holes in people, start looking for positives. Was there a reasonable level of attraction?
3) Did you have a reasonable amount of common interests?
Maybe you discover that he has some different interests than you, interests that you might even think are a little strange. You don’t need to have everything in common, just a reasonable amount of common interests.
- Again, it prevents women from dating in these extremes.
- They are opening their hearts and minds up to men who, something might blossom over time.
- It doesn’t have to be an immediate lightning bolt connection.
That’s what happened for Dave and me.
- I met him and thought, “That guy was really nice. I’d like to see him again.”
- On the second date, I thought, “Wow, this is really starting to build.”
- On the third date, I thought, “Yes, this is definitely going somewhere.”
I allowed things to develop and blossom over time.
What Do You Think?
Have you been dating reasonably? Ask yourself these questions and then let us know your results. Share your thoughts in the comments below.
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The above is an excerpt from Jasbina’s interview with Neely Steinberg.
The entire interview transcript is at: Neely Steinberg Interview – Unleashing Your Inner Entrepreneur to Find Love
Listen to the entire interview on: Intersections Match Talk Radio – Jasbina’s Lifestyle Show
Listen to the entire interview on Blog Talk Radio: Unleashing Your Inner Entrepreneur to Find Love – Neely Steinberg
Listen to the entire interview on iTunes