2 Religions in 1 Couple
Kristina Lynn asks Jasbina Ahluwalia: Yes. Thanks for that, Denise. I think that was a really important point.
Jasbina, I imagine this question is something that you deal with on a regular basis because of the importance that is placed on family in the Indian culture. We touched on this a little bit but this question will take us into more detail.
This gal says, “I’ve been dating a guy for the past two months who is agnostic and he was raised that way. I’m Christian but more spiritual than religious. It’s not a deal breaker for me because he has all my other essentials.
I’m worried about how my parents will react because they’re very devout Christians. My Grandpa is a minister. We’re getting pretty serious already. Is there any advice on how to break the news to my family?”
Despite how important family is, I would put family aside for a second.
2 Religions in 1 Couple: Process Your Thoughts
First, I’d like her to process her own thoughts and feelings.
The one thing that jumped out to me, in terms of being agnostic and Christian, I think it’s important to look to the future.
2 Religions in 1 Couple: Plan for Kids
If having kids is important to her, I would also want her to visit the thoughts of, “How do I want to feel? How do I want my kids to be raised? What do I want them to believe? What is important to me with respect to that?”
When people have kids, sometimes whatever direction they’re taking can be a bit amped up.
I know she mentioned that she’s more spiritual than religious. Sometimes people tend to amp up the religion of their family once kids come in the picture.
2 Religions in 1 Couple: Communication
She should be clear for herself in terms of how she wants to deal with that. She should also engage her boyfriend in a discussion about it.
I think it’s very important for her to do alone and then with him.
2 Religions in 1 Couple: Family Involvement
Typically, your family has your best interests in mind.
I think they would take comfort in the fact that she has processed things on her own and done the due diligence with her boyfriend before even coming to them.
They would feel like she’s taking this seriously before bringing them in.
Once she’s done her homework on her own and with her boyfriend, if she feels that she and her boyfriend are viable, then she can go to her parents and let them know.
She can tell them that she processed this on her own. She’s thought about children and her future. She discussed that with her boyfriend and they feel they are on the same page.
Conveying that to her parents is important.
That’s an excellent point. I know that Denise has something that she’d like to add to this as well.
2 Religions in 1 Couple: Real Story
Yes, I do. This hits home on a personal note. I want to give the listener some advice from my own personal experience.
I’m more spiritual than religious myself. I ended up marrying a Jewish boy.
I was really concerned if his family would be accepting towards that difference in religion. Once they got to know me, which happened pretty quickly, they realized what a good person I was.
They realized what a good couple we made.
Those differences were irrelevant. They didn’t matter.
It’s not necessarily a matter of thinking, “Oh my goodness. We’re different religions. How is my family going to handle it?”
It’s a matter of presenting yourself as the best possible version of your authentic self.
In my experience, it worked out perfectly. I hope that you keep that in mind when you take the next step.
Are you a “2 religions in 1 couple” success story? Share your stories in the comments section below.
The above is an excerpt from Kristina Lynn’s interview with Jasbina Ahluwalia.
The entire interview transcript is at: