Prepare for Online Dating: Personal Tips
Jasbina Ahluwalia asks Julie Spira and Dr. Dale Koppel: As a professional matchmaker and dating coach who assists clients with both their offline and online dating, I’m fascinated by insights and perspectives regarding relationships and dating.
I’ve enjoyed reading both of your books and would love to explore some of the insights you share. Dr. Koppel, let’s start here. I found a quote in your book particularly compelling and would like to share it with our listeners, and then have you expand.
You wrote, “It’s not just about choosing the site, then writing your profile.
It’s about taking a good, hard look at yourself and deciding whether there are any major decisions you have to make about yourself.
I’m talking about your personality, your appearance, your outlook, your goals. You’re the one who has to decide whether there are things you truly don’t like about yourself.
I’m talking about plastic surgery, dental work, an exercise regimen, weight loss, weight gain, therapy, life coaching, antidepressants, electrolysis, quitting smoking, but only if you and only you think it’s necessary.
If you think it’s necessary, get it done before you join an online dating service. There’s nothing wrong with saying, this is my one-year plan.
At the end of the year, when I’ve accomplished my personal goals, that’s when I’ll be ready to join an online dating site.” Tell us about that.
How To Prepare for Online Dating
Dr. Dale Koppel
(3:32): I feel like there are so many people out there, women especially, who find reasons why they are not meeting Mr. Right or Mr. Right Now.
They attribute qualities about themselves that may or may not be true.
Prepare for Online Dating: Are You Happy With The Way You Are?
If someone, for example, says, “I really need to lose weight,” then that’s their decision. Why wait to do it if you are making such a big decision about your future?
How To Prepare for Online Dating: Real Life Story
For example, I had terrible teeth. Before I went online, I had cosmetic dental surgery. I had caps put on my teeth. When I met men, one of the first things they would say to me was, “You have a fabulous smile.”
I realized that I hadn’t smiled as much as I smiled after I had work done on my teeth. I always wondered after the fact whether I would have been as popular as I was had my teeth looked bad. I did it because I wanted to.
Prepare for Online Dating for Yourself
Thinking about going online and meeting a man was my incentive. That was the point I was trying to make.
It’s okay to think about who you are and who you would better be before you take such a giant step.
When you go online and decide you’re going to meet someone who you are ideally going to spend the rest of your life with, that’s a very big step.
You should be prepared to do it in many different ways.
Any online daters here do anything special to prepare for online dating? Tell us your stories in the comments section below.
The above is an excerpt from Jasbina’s interview with Julie Spira and Dale Koppel.
The entire interview transcript is at: Julie Spira – Dale Koppel Interview – Insights In Online Dating
Listen to the entire interview on: Intersections Match Talk Radio – Jasbina’s Lifestyle Show
Listen to the entire interview on Blog Talk Radio: Navigating Online Dating: Discussion with Dr. Dale Koppel & Julie Spira
Listen to the entire interview on iTunes