Learn Local Dating Customs

Jasbina Ahluwalia asks Lorii Abela, author of Sexy Secrets to a Juicy Love Life: On one hand, you’re dealing with the basics for the ex-pat. Then, how is the ex-pat received?

Are people looking at the ex-pat and making assumptions on their values based on the fact that they are an ex-pat? This may or may not be true.

We all walk around with these ideas of what it means to come from a particular country or what values and mindset someone might have.

That’s an additional challenge.

On the one hand, you’re dealing with all of this not knowing how you’re being received by people in this country.

Given those pressures, do you have any recommendations on how ex-pats can alleviate these pressures a bit?


Lorii Abela

Learn Local Dating Customs: No School, Read Instead

You have to start from scratch. This doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to go back to school, because there is no school for learning these things. You have to do your own reading.


Why to Learn Local Dating Customs

You need to learn about dating practices, particularly if you’re looking for someone.

For example, you may think you’re in a relationship with someone here. But, for a man who is local here, he might think you’re just friends.


Learn Local Dating Customs to Avoid Misunderstandings

Where do you draw the boundaries? Women especially are scared. They think, “I already call him my boyfriend but he thinks we’re just friends.”


Learn Local Dating Customs: Friends Will Help

It’s scary for a lot of women. You also have to befriend people who are native to this country who can tell you what’s really happening.

It’s always nice to have a different point of view coming from someone who is local and can explain to you, “This is what’s happening.”

You’re not in there yet but you’re assuming that you’re already in there.

For example, let’s say that you’re watching TV. You might assume that what you see on TV is the reality.


Learn Local Dating Customs and Behaviors

You need to learn what’s really going on around you. You should always find out where you stand.

You can’t just think, “I have to be modern.” If it’s too difficult for you to bear what’s being presented to you, you have to draw your limits.

It doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to change yourself. That’s you.

I also have European friends. They say, “I don’t want to lose my accent. I’ll lose my identity.” Some people are actually attracted to your accent.


Tell Us:

How do you learn local dating customs? List your tips for us in the comments section below.


The above is an excerpt from Jasbina’s interview with Lorii Abela

The entire interview transcript is at: Lorii Abela Interview – Sexy Secrets to a Juicy Love Life

Listen to the entire interview on: Intersections Match Talk Radio – Jasbina’s Lifestyle Show

Listen to the entire interview on Blog Talk Radio: Sexy Secrets to a Juicy Love Life – Lorii Abela

Listen to the entire interview on iTunes