Is He a Puppy Dog?
Jasbina Ahluwalia asks Rachel Greenwald, author of , Have Him at Hello: Confessions from 1,000 Guys about What Makes Them Fall in Love or Never Call Back: That’s interesting and insightful. There are ten of them in your book, Rachel Greenwald. We hit three of them. There will be seven more to check out.
Is He a Puppy Dog?: No Second Date
For the benefit of our male listeners, you have the top five reasons in your book that women decline second dates. Let’s talk about two of them.
I’ll read each of these aloud for the benefit of our listeners. After I read it, I’d love to give you the opportunity to explain.
The number one reason that women decline second dates with guys, you characterize that as the “puppy dog.” Tell us about that.
Is He a Puppy Dog: Rejected Second Date
I turned the tables after I interviewed all of these men. I interviewed women as well.
I did a survey of 100 women. I asked them why they declined a second date with men.
The number one reason I categorized as the puppy dog. This was where women complained about men who were too eager to please them. They were almost wimpy. They seemed overly nice.
Is He a Puppy Dog: Too Nice
I want to clarify this. It’s not that women were saying they didn’t like nice guys. They didn’t like overly nice, almost sycophantic nice guys who seemed desperate or weak.
There was a fine line between nice and overly nice. The overly nice guy that they didn’t respond to reminded them of a puppy dog. They thought he was sweet.
They felt a pang or felt sorry for him.
They thought, “Some other girl will be lucky.” Ultimately, they felt like he just didn’t have an edge.
Is He a Puppy Dog? Example
One example of that was a guy who wrote several gushing emails before he even met the woman for a first date.
They had an online email exchange. A couple of them were really good.
The few days leading up to their first date, he started sending her emails that said, “I’ve started saying your name, Jane, over and over again. It sounds nice. I wake up thinking of you and anticipating our date.” It’s just too much.
This was before the first date?
Is He a Puppy Dog?: First Date Scare
Yes, this example was before the first date. That sets the tone for the first date. Already, she is a little put off.
They go on the first date and he’s overly flattering. He said, “I can’t get over how beautiful you are. I think you’re so fantastic in all these ways.”
Women were saying that they were almost disappointed to receive these excessively flattering compliments because they didn’t seem sincere and they became annoying.
It almost feels desperate on the guy’s part.
It reminded them of a puppy dog who was overly eager to please.
Is He a Puppy Dog? Is She a Boss Lady?
The number one reason that men said they didn’t want to see a woman again was that she was too masculine.
Here, women were saying the number one reason they didn’t want to see a man again was the he was almost too feminine. He had feminine characteristics of not being the strong, aggressive male that has an edge and makes her feel like she is taken care of and protected.
I thought that was a fascinating contrast.
Have you dated the puppy dog type? Did you dump him? Share your stories with us in the comments section below.
The above is an excerpt from Jasbina’s interview with Rachel Greenwald
The entire interview transcript is at: Rachel Greenwald Interview: Have Him At Hello!
Listen to the entire interview on: Intersections Match Talk Radio – Jasbina’s Lifestyle Show
Listen to the entire interview on iTunes